Zombie Survival Tip #25

     What up guys! Sorry it is so late that I post this tip! It is 11:57 PM here in New York! I was planning on doing it at 8:00 PM but I didn't get to it because I just got this thing for the computer, called Steam. It is like a gaming engine for the computer. If you like games (who doesn't?) then I recommend you get Steam. If you are interested, email me (at Gnarsomesminecraft@gmail.com) or look it up. It is awesome, I downloaded a free game called Team Fortress 2, it is cool! Okay, enough of that! Onto tip number 25... Actually, before I get to the tip. I just want to say something. Listen closely. Thank you all of my fans for supporting me. I would also like to thank those who followed me and gave me +1 points! Thanks guys! Another thing, tell your friends! Get a Google account or something! I need more points/hits! Oh, by the way, I heard some really mean things about my blog and towards me. So I just want to say that I work really Really hard on this blog. This blog is a survival/comedic blog. Enjoy it! Obtain knowledge! Don't hate a good thing! Wow. I can't believe I am already at tip number 25! It has only been like three months! But trust me, I will never run out of tips. I am one of the smartest people alive (zombie wise). Okay, now onto tip number 25! Tip number 25 is... "Weapons Are Your Best Friends!" This is true. You wouldn't last three minutes in a zombie apocalypse without a weapon. Now, this tip could give people mixed feelings, so let me explain. Okay, yes, weapons are your best friends, but that does not mean to neglect your other friends. Now you understand? It is a metaphor. Okay! Today's picture is of guns. That's it. I just picked a random picture from my zombie vault. I got this picture! Okay! Tip number 26 will be posted on June 24th! Stick around!
Picture of the Day: Your Best Friends

Zombie Survival Tip #24

     Welcome back! Today's tip is one of the ones I have been waiting to do for a long time! This is by far one of the best tips, why you ask? Because it is one of the most easiest ones to explain! Okay, I am just going to get into it! Today's tip is... "Use Your Environment!" This means to use items around you to attack zombies. If you need to, then use things around you, here are some examples of things you could use that you could find anywhere. A fire extinguisher, axe, chair, computer, etc. Use anything to your advantage! This tip makes a lot of sense for two reasons. One, you can use your environment to conserve ammo. Two, you can use your environment to replace a gun. Now, this is like my rule with melee weapons, try not to get close. If you can, try to stay as far away as possible. If you have a fire extinguisher, hit them till they are down, then finish them off! Now, I will give you an example on how this tip is used. The video game series Dead Rising depicts the player using their environment. Basically, the whole game is revolving around the player killing zombies with anything that you see, you can use axes, chairs, magazine dispensers, anything! Now. I don't know if you are thinking the same thing I am thinking. How in the world can you pick up really heavy things like in Dead Rising (the player can pick up very heavy things.)? Well, in the real world, you can't. You can't lift a lot of things in real life that you can pick up in the game. Trust me. I have tried! I can lift heavy things, but I can't lift a magazine dispenser! I will reference back to this game in a later tip. Very later. Okay! That is it for tip #24! Tip #25 will be posted on June 22! The picture of the day is of the Dead Rising video game cover!

Zombie Survival Tip #23

     Today is the day for tip number 23! This one is going to be a short one though... Okay, I am going to start right off. Tip number 23 is... "Electricity is Key!" This means that you should have electricity, but use it wisely, do not let zombies see the electricity because they will gather and attack, especially at night! If they see it then they will follow it! Be wise on how you use your electricity! You can use your electricity in many ways, lights, machines, cooling devices, heating devices, etc. One way to harness electricity is through lightning. Think about that! Okay, my next tip will be posted on the 20th! Stick around! The picture of the day is of colored lightning. How does that happen you ask? A gas exchange occurs in the atmosphere causes the color, and the lightning is natural!
Picture of the Day: Colored Lightning 

Special Zombie Survival "Tip" #2

     Special "tip" number two! Finally! I have been waiting forever for this! As you probably know already, I do special "tips" on certain holidays, again the reason tips is in quotes is because they aren't really tips, they are more like random cool stuff. Can you guess what today is? You guessed it! Father's day! Wish your father a happy Father's day and get him something special! Like a CDC Zombie Task Force T-shirt, or you know, get me one! I'm just kidding, or am I? Okay, today's special cool thing is about this one guy, his name is George Romero, you may know him also as the Godfather of all Zombies. Romero is a legend that will live out through history, this man created the best zombie movies ever. I am a major major fan of his, I have watched all of his movies at least 100 times, maybe even more than that. This man is a god! He makes everything feel scary and realistic at the same time. Some of his classics include: Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Land of the Dead, Diary of the Dead, Etc.: If you want to learn more about this man, go to IMDB or email me for more info, look this man up if you like zombies. He is awesome! But the coolest thing is, we both are very very knowledgeable in the arts of zombies, I mean we are the smartest people about zombies on the Earth, and that is no joke, honestly, we both are the smartest people on Earth, zombie wise that is... Okay, the link of the day is the site for the T-shirt, and also a link to George Romero's filmography list! Special zombie survival "tip" three will be coming out on Independence day, also known as the 4th of July! Tip number 23 will be posted tomorrow! Stick around!
Link of the Day: CDC Zombie Task Force T-Shirt
Link of the Day 2: George Romero's Filmography List
                                                                        

Zombie Survival Tip #22

     Welcome back! Sorry that it took awhile for me to post this tip, I just had to do some stuff at home (you know, zombi-fying my home! Just kidding!). So... Today's tip was supposed to be don't mess with the government, but I was thinking, that is basically the same as that other tip (can't remember which number tip it was) don't trust the government, so I decided not to do it. Today's tip will be "Melee Weapons Are Very Useful!" This tip obviously makes a lot of sense, melee weapons (such as a baseball bat, machete, pipe, sword, crowbar, etc.) are very useful for one major reason. To conserve ammo. Of course, don't use a baseball bat if you are facing like 20 zombies, that is a bad idea, kill some off with a handgun or something light, then when there is about 10 then use the bat. But remember, melee weapons don't need reloading and they don't run out of ammo, but they will wear down and break eventually. Remember guys, I need more hits, and +1's, and more followers! I thank LuckyDucky for giving me a + and for following. Stick around guys for tomorrow. Why? Because tomorrow is Father's day and also the day I post my second special tip! Tip number 23 will be posted on June 18th! The link of the day is a top 10 list of melee weapons for a zombie apocalypse! Enjoy! See you on Father's day!
Link of the Day: Top 10 Zombie Melee Weapons

Zombie Survival Tip #21

     Look at that! Another Google +1 point! Thanks you guys! We need more! + this page and follow it and go to my blog's Facebook page (http://www.facebook.com/ZombieApocalypseTips) and like it. It is sad, I am at tip #21 and I don't have at least 7,000 hits! My other blog, in a week got 100,000 hits! Step it up guys! Okay, recent news shows that the victim of that face-eating guy (Ronald Poppo) is still alive! Meaning no zombies! It says he is okay and slowly recovering. I don't think they mentioned that he is currently fighting off an infection and he is suffering some sort of brain problem, oh no, maybe I was wrong! I'm kidding, zombies aren't real, trust me! Finally to tip number 21! Tip number 21 is... "Search for Help!" Yes, I know that I said before (or at least I think I did) that you shouldn't look for help because there is a fair chance that they are psychos or there won't be people. Well, I am going back on my word, search for help or for a group or anything for as long as you can. Use common sense though, don't go out at like 2 AM to find people, go out in the morning when there is a lot of light because you can see zombies then. Search for help because if you search long enough, then you will probably find a group of non-psychos sooner or later. Of course, if the zombie apocalypse did happen (which it probably won't in my lifetime) then come to me because we will all live! I am a zombie mastermind, believe it or not, I'm one of the smartest people (zombie wise) alive! That is awesome! I've had one of the most smart people (zombie wise) actually tell me that I was smarter than him! Okay, the link of the day is the news page of the recovering victim of the face-eating guy. The next tip will be posted on June 16th! Also my second special tip is coming out on the 17th! A.K.A. Father's day! Stick around!
Link of the Day: Face-Eating Maniac's Victim Is Recovering 

Zombie Survival Tip #20

     Yes! Why am I happy you ask? Because, I can trust you with my expectations! 5000 hits and one Google +1 point and one more follower, you guys are awesome! Now let us get more hits! A lot more! It feels like forever since tip one and now we are on tip 20, it has been like 40 days! Let's do the time warp again! You see what I did there?! The song, Let's Do the Time Warp Again from the movie Rocky Horror Picture Show! Never mind... Oh yeah, if you have good observation skills, then you probably realized that I changed my profile picture! Yes, I did, I got bored of the other one, so I changed it to a picture of my favorite game series, Dead Space. The picture is the logo for Dead Space 3, it comes out someday in February, 2013. Now, if the world doesn't end on December 21, 2012, then I will get a chance to play it. It looks awesome. Okay, now onto the so long awaited tip number 20! Tip number 20 is... "Humor Is A Necessity!" Trust me, you probably think I'm an idiot, but this relates to tip number 13, be sure you always have someone to talk to. Yeah sure, you do need to be serious a lot in a zombie apocalypse, like when zombies are seen, or ammo is scarce, or someone dies, but when you are partying after finding some booze, then humor is a necessity. Don't be serious all the time (like I am in real life). Just don't, too much stress and seriousness can lead to mental injuries and actual physical injuries. Remember, laughter is the best medicine! Well you know, other than anti-bionics, pain medicine, prescribed medicine, and some sort of cure (which there will be no cure, and it is very unlikely someone will have it or make). Okay, see tip number 21 on June 14th! Also, on June 17th, which is also Father's day, I will post my second annual special tip! Honestly, I don't know what it will be yet! The picture of the day is a zombie picture with funny captions. My zombie vault is so full! I need to delete some stuff!
Picture of the Day: Zombies Look For Brains

Zombie Survival Tip #19

     I see that I won't lose faith in you guys! You oversaw my expectations! 5000 hits already before my 20th post! You guys are good! Well, time for tip number 19! Tip number 19 is... "Steal Gasoline From Cars Or From Gas Stations!" Gasoline is a necessity in a zombie apocalypse, you need a lot (depending on how much you would use it). In a zombie apocalypse, you need to know how to drain fuel from a car (the link of the day is on how to drain fuel from a car). Also, if a gas station is still functioning (most likely not so that is why you should stock up before it happens) then you can get some there. Now, some gas stations will still function, it would just be a pain to get. Gasoline can be used for many things, such as vehicles and fire starters. Tip number 20 (the long awaited 20th tip) will be posted on June 12th! Stick around!
Link of the Day: How To Drain Gasoline From A Car

Zombie Survival Tip #18

     I am sorry! This is the first time (I think) that I have been late posting a tip. You see, this tip was supposed to be posted on June 8th, when today is June 9th. Okay, well, let me talk about today's tip. Tip number 18 is... "Don't Act Like A Zombie, It Just Leaves You As An Easy Meal!" There have been many many movies where people have done this, and succeed, but that is a load of crap for many reasons, one, if you cover yourself in zombie guts and you have a cut or a wound or some other opening, you would get infected. Secondly, zombies are stupid but not that stupid, they would be able to tell if you were one of them or not. Thirdly, they can tell if you are human, you have a scent still, and certain movements that are human like. They have done this in many movies/shows. Such as, AMC's The Walking Dead, House of the Dead 2, and many more. Like I have said many many times, listen to me and use your zombie survival common sense. Tip number 19 will be coming to you on June 10th (tomorrow). Remember, I want 5000 hits when I get to tip 20! The picture of the day is from AMC's The Walking Dead show where two characters are acting like zombies (which worked in the show, but we all know it is a load of crap)!

Picture of the Day: Acting Like A Zombie

Zombie Survival Tip #17

     Welcome back! I got nothing important to say other than that I haven't got any reply from the people I want to interview. Okay, onto tip number 17! Tip number 17 is "Don't Trust the Government!" This tip actually applies to now, not just to the zombie apocalypse. Do you want an example? Okay! Area 51, no one really knows what is there, only the government. Okay, well you are probably thinking "How does this apply to a zombie apocalypse?!" Well I will tell you! Don't trust the government because they, first of all, probably will lure you in and they think everything will be fine until they don't realize that they aren't going to be fine, and also they could go crazy and stuff, and they could try to rape you too! All three of those examples are from a movie (not just this movie) called 28 Days Later. They went to a military outpost and those things happened, the worst part is they tried to rape some people! That is awful! Just don't trust the government unless you are sure that you can either, one, save them if you need to, or two, that they can protect you. Because if they can't do that, then you can kiss your life good-bye! Tip number 18 will be posted on June 8th! When I get to tip 20, I really hope that I will have at least another Google +1 point and at least 5000 hits, if not, I will be really disappointed... Okay, the picture of the day is a funny picture.
Picture of the Day: Trust Me! I'm From the Government!

Zombie Survival Tip #16

     Hey I'm back! Just to tell you again zombies are not real, trust me. Not to get your hopes up, but I emailed a few people, zombie writer/director people to visit the blog and stuff, and maybe get an interview! But I honestly don't know what is going to happen yet. Not to get your hopes up. Okay, to get your mind off the (possible) guest appearances, here is tip number 16! "Be Sure You Know How to Hot Wire Cars!" Okay, just to tell you, yes, hot wiring cars is ILLEGAL, but that does not apply in a zombie apocalypse. Now listen, this does not mean to go hot wire cars, this is only for a zombie apocalypse, not real life. Because, you know, if you do hot wire a car, you will get arrested, well actually, it depends on whose car you hot wire, you won't get in trouble (actually you might but I'm not sure) if you hot wire your own car, but you have to have a reason and everything. Okay, now to explain, you might need to hot wire a car in a zombie apocalypse for many reasons, too tired to walk, it is the only vehicle, quick getaway, no key, etc. Even if you won't have to (and you know if) it is always good to know anyway. My next tip will be posted on June 6th! The link of the day is a how to page on how to hot wire your car. Remember, hot wire with safety!
Link of the Day: How to Hot Wire Your Car

Zombie Survival Tip #15

     Sorry I haven't posted my tip yet, I was just packing my zombie survival kit, and I advise you to pack too! Why? Because latest news show many many eyewitness accounts of "cannibalistic" attacks. Cannibalistic meaning that people have been eating people, brains, hearts, faces. Do you think I'm crazy? Look at these "Zombie" Attack, then this! "Zombie" Attack 2, and this! "Zombie" Attack 3, or this! "Zombie" Attack 4, holy shit, now you believe me?! This may be the goddamn apocalypse coming! Seriously though, zombies aren't real (or are they?), and these may be some crazy things, but damn it, I am getting ready, I got my guns in my safe when they gang up and shit. Is this real though? That's the question. Okay, getting ready for this upcoming (possible) zombie attack leads me to tip number 15. "Be Prepared!" Honestly, this is the most important tip. Be prepared like I am, have guns, weapons, food, water. Seriously, I doubt the stuff above is actually real zombies, but anything is possible, holy shit, this is cool, but bad, there are no restart buttons, if you die, you die, no restarts. What am I thinking, it is not real (I think). Be prepared guys, if this is a zombie apocalypse (which I can 99.9% guarantee it's not, but if it is) be prepared, get anything you need. I am! It is always good to be safe! The links of the day are two links that contain a list of stuff for a zombie survival kit! Trust me, I will still be posting tips though!
Zombie Survival Kit List
Zombie Survival Kit List 2

Now. I just checked, the CDC (Center of Disease Control) claims that zombies do not exist, and that these were just freak cannibal acts (that happened in the same week basically!). I agree with them, this drug called "Bath Salts" is what made that naked guy eat that other guys face off, so there is no need to get worried, don't worry, and if you don't believe me about the CDC, here. And By the way, email me or call me or Facebook me for any questions, comments, or concerns you may have, and also, if the zombie apocalypse does happen, find me, we will survive!

CDC: There Are No Zombies